I am happy to announce that my memoir, To Helen With Love, is finally published!
After five years in the making, this has been one of the most intense endeavors I’ve ever taken on, but well worth it.
While I was writing this memoir I discovered how much pain I still had deep inside of me. Pain from some of the experiences. Pain from not knowing what or how to deal with dementia. Pain of not understanding what caregiving entails. Pain from dealing with the healthcare field. Finally, pain when it’s all over.
Many times through my caregiving years I felt lonely inside. Even after my Mother’s death I felt loneliness. You know what I mean if you are a Caregiver or have been one. Even though I was surrounded by family and people I loved, there was still a sense of loneliness.
Pouring through my journals to capture information for my memoir was like going back in time and reliving the experiences. Some of my entries were humorous and other entries were screaming “help, I don’t understand”. Still others were filled with sadness and torment. I even found myself in tears while typing the manuscript! I began to realize I wasn’t “done” with my grieving, not even close. That’s when I discovered I had not had any closure after the death of my Mother.
Writing this memoir may have taken me through all those emotions from beginning to end again, but it also gave me closure. I had no idea how much I needed that.
Personally, I don’t believe we ever truly “get over” the death of someone we love, we just learn to accept it; we never really forget. My loved ones are still close to my heart.
My intention for writing this memoir is to help other caregivers know they are not alone in their journey. To let them know it’s an ongoing learning experience all the way to the end. There’s no magic wand to free up the pain and sacrificing a caregiver deals with.
In my personal experience, my faith was my saving grace throughout my caregiving years. The Lord carried me through some rough turbulent seas, without Him I would have drowned.
A scripture that came to me during the writing of my memoir, and is included inside the book is:
“Weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.”Psalm 30:5
I do hope, if you decide to read my memoir, you will find comfort and hope.
Where to find To Helen With Love:
http://www.xulonpress.com/bookstore/bookdetail.php?PB_ISBN=9781498492812&HC_ISBN=, Amazon and Barnes and Noble