Where is the focus of a caregiver? Where should it be?
You might be thinking, “That’s a crazy question. Of course the focus is on my loved one.”
It’s not so crazy of a question if you really give it some thought.
Yes, part of the focus is on the person you’re caring for. But shouldn’t the focus also be on YOU?
Think about it:
- Are you staying healthy?
- Are you getting enough sleep
- Are you taking a day for yourself (ever)?
- Is your day filled with fear, negativity, resentment and all the “what if’s”?
If you answered “no” to the first three and “yes” to the last point, then you need to start doing some focusing on you.
In my opinion, caregivers have one of the hardest, unrewarding and challenging job on the planet! There’s (usually) no income, no incentives, no bonuses and no perks that typical jobs sometimes offer. So what else is there to focus on, right?
Focus on the gift you were given. What gift? There’s a gift involved? As a matter of fact, there is. You, have been given the privilege to care for someone you love very much. Someone who has been a huge influence in your life. Someone who has made a difference in your life in the past, or maybe the present. Someone you love so much you wouldn’t dare think of anyone besides you to take care of them. And you know what? You do an amazing job as a caregiver. Yes, go right ahead and pat yourself on the back. You deserve some recognition for all that you have done and are doing right at this very time.
I find it somewhat fitting to quote part of a song by Donna Summers from 1983:
“_____years have come and gone
And she’s seen a lot of tears of the ones who come in.
They really seem to need her there.
It’s a sacrifcie working day to day.
For little money just tips for pay.
But it’s worth it all just to hear them say that they care.”
I left the number of years blank on purpose. The song says 28 years. For me, I can insert 19 years. You can insert your own time to make it fit for you. I also left in the part about the money because some of you might be getting paid even if it’s a small amount.
The point is, everyone works hard at being a caregiver day in and day out. It’s truly a sacrifice, but you are needed! We love and care about those in our charge and we would go to the end of the earth to do what is best for them. So why not do the same for yourself?
Try to focus a little more on yourself so you can be all you need to be as a Caregiver.